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Dr. Lois Frankel
Dr. Lois Frankel
Dr. Lois Frankel
Nice Girls Just Don’t Get It, By Lois P. Frankel, Ph.D
Dr. Lois Frankel

As an executive coach I’ve seen both men and women make mistakes that cause others to doubt their leadership potential. Leadership mistakes are not in the exclusive domain of women. But I believe that our families, our communities, and our countries suffer when capable women exhibit a reluctance to lead. I’m often asked if I think women make better leaders than men. No, I don’t think that. Leaders aren’t good because they belong to one gender or the other, they’re good because they possess the qualities and characteristics needed for a particular time and place.

It’s been said that great leaders aren’t interchangeable. Whereas Patton was a great leader during World War II, I don’t think he could effectively lead today’s troops. Similarly, whereas Mary Kay Ash, founder of Mary Kay Cosmetics, built a great company at a time when women wanted opportunities to be financially independent and spend time with their families, I don’t think she could have replaced Carly Fiorina at HP Compaq. No, gender is not a prerequisite for leadership.

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Nice Girls Just Don’t Get It
99 Ways to Win the Respect You Deserve, the Success You’ve Earned, and the Life You Want

Offering the same brand of practical, no-holds-barred, expert advice that made Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office an international million-copy bestseller, Nice Girls Just Don't Get It teaches us the skills we need to turn from a nice girl into a winning woman, not just in our careers but in our relationships, families, and everyday lives.

Have you ever felt invisible? Taken advantage of? Reluctant (or unable) to articulate what you really want? If so, join the club. The nice girls club. Nice girls—that's right, girls—are those more concerned with pleasing others than with addressing their own needs and haven't yet learned how to overcome the childhood messages cultural stereotypes keeping them from getting their voices heard, their needs met, and the lives they want. (Read more.)

This book will turn those nice girls into winning women. That is, women who factor their own needs in with those of others, confront those who treat them disrespectfully, maintain healthy and mutually beneficial relationships with appropriate boundaries— and as a result, are happier and more successful in every area of their life.

In 2004, Lois Frankel blew the lid off so many of our long-held ideas about gender and success with her bestselling Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office, which went on to become such a huge phenomenon, the term "nice girls" has secured a place in our cultural lexicon. Here, Frankel teams up with negotiation expert Carol Frohlinger to bring this bestselling advice out of the workplace and provide a broader set of skills that any woman—whether a CEO or stay-at-home mom—can use to win anywhere, with anyone.

Presented in the straightforward, digestible format that helped make Nice Girl's Don't Get the Corner Office an instant hit, Frankel and Frohlinger outline seven practical strategies and 99 supporting tactics that every winning woman should know. By the time you've finished reading this book, you'll be able to:

  • Get your husband to do his half of the household chores—without being made to feel like a nag.
  • Stop overextending yourself by taking on all the unpleasant tasks no one on your volunteer board, or your team at work will go near.
  • Win an argument with your mother in law about who will be hosting Christmas dinner.
  • Have the courage to send back a meal that isn’t prepared the way you’d ordered it.
  • Confront a colleague who is shirking responsibility or taking credit for your work.
  • Convince a sales person to reduce a fee, waive a surcharge, or honor a store credit.
  • Question a doctor’s course or treatment or request a second opinion, instead of simply going along in order to be a “good” patient.
  • Firmly but politely bow out of an extravagant vacation to celebrate a friend’s birthday that you simply can’t afford–without feeling guilty about it.

A must-read for anyone who's ever felt taken advantage of by a friend or family member, unappreciated by a spouse or partner, or exploited by a vindictive neighbor or co-worker, Nice Girls Just Don't Get It offers women the indispensable knowledge and skills to get the things they want, the respect they've earned, and the success they deserve.

This book is a treasure! If you’re looking for smart, down-to-earth strategies for building a fulfilling life, look no further. Frankel and Frohlinger are a winning team of coaches whose advice is essential reading for women who want to use their talents to the fullest.
Anne Fisher, "Ask Annie" career and workplace columnist, CNNmoney.com

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